Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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