i was rollin on her like bob the builder
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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