Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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