don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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