me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Randomize
