My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
My breasts were aching with rage.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
