ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
she told me i tasted like america
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
