You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
