honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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