After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
You dont lie about slip and slides
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize