I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize