alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Randomize
