and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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