alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Randomize
