You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
