I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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