:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
