so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
