I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize
