I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
