If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Randomize
