i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
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