omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
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