I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Randomize
