hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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