I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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