But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Randomize
