no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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