She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
