needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
Randomize
