Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize