I am puke
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
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