I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize