Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
