Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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