why didn't you poke me back
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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