mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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