she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
