When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize