who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
