you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
