ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
