NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
