i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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