We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
