Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Randomize
