Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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