Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
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Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
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The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
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