See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Life is so much better after having sex.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
