i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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