Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
