i don't plan on having that self control this summer
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
